When Friendship Takes a Wild Detour

You know that moment when you’re scrolling through Instagram, and you see someone you used to call your best friend forever post about their new job, new dog, or their engagement (when did that even happen?!). Suddenly, it hits you—you don't even remember the last time you talked. It’s like somewhere between “Let’s grab lunch soon” and “Let’s catch up sometime,” you became complete strangers. Weird, right?

Well, buckle up, my friend, because we’re about to dive into one of the strangest adulting problems out there: realizing that the people who once knew your every secret now barely know you at all.

Remember when we were inseparable? Those late-night texts that went from venting about life to the most random memes? Those inside jokes that could make us laugh until we cried? Yeah, those were the days. But then, life did what it does best: it got busy.

Suddenly, adult responsibilities like paying bills, working overtime, and finding something remotely nutritious to eat between meetings took over. Before we knew it, our deep conversations about dreams and ambitions turned into casual “Hey, how’ve you been?” exchanges. The texts spaced out, the hangouts got postponed, and eventually, silence crept in.

It wasn't anyone's fault. It’s just that adulthood is like a black hole for free time. One day you’re planning a weekend road trip with your bestie, and the next you’re wondering how two months went by without so much as a "hi."

Here’s where it gets wild. You start meeting new people—at work, at church, through your partner’s friends—and suddenly you’re forming connections with people who don’t know the 16-year-old you..

These new friends? They’re great. But it’s not the same. They haven’t seen you through your awkward phases, your bad decisions, or your “I’m trying to figure out life” meltdowns. They didn’t witness your messy growth into the semi-responsible adult you are today. And guess what? That’s okay. But it feels...different. Almost like you’ve started living parallel lives, and your past friendships are still stuck in the same timeline.

Fast forward to running into your old BFF at the grocery store. You’re both standing in front of the cereal aisle, awkwardly trying to figure out if it’s worth saying hello or pretending you didn’t see each other. Spoiler alert: the conversation will be painfully polite and probably last all of five minutes.

Suddenly, you realize something heartbreaking: you don’t really know each other anymore. Sure, you have memories. But people change. You’ve changed. They’ve changed. And that’s not something a five-minute conversation can fix.

I know, I know—this is starting to sound pretty depressing. But hold on, there’s hope. And trust me, it’s not found in scrolling through old messages, trying to resurrect the friendship from its grave.

The reality is that relationships shift as we grow. Sometimes, they fade, and that’s not a reflection of failure—it’s just life. But here’s where the hope comes in: even when our earthly friendships fall apart, there’s one relationship that never changes, no matter how busy or distant we become—our friendship with Jesus.

Unlike our human friendships, Jesus doesn’t "slow fade" on us. He’s there, constant and unchanging, ready to meet us right where we are, even when we’ve been neglecting Him for a while. He doesn’t send us vague “Let’s catch up sometime” texts—He’s actively pursuing us, every day.

So, while it’s sad to drift from old friends, it’s a reminder that the most important relationship in your life is the one that won’t ever fade. Jesus knows every part of your journey—past, present, and future—and He’s not going anywhere. Even if you and your old BFFs are now practically strangers, there’s comfort in knowing you’re never truly alone.

And here’s the final twist: sometimes, when you least expect it, those friendships can be rekindled. Maybe you reconnect at a wedding or over coffee one random Tuesday, and you realize that, even though you’ve changed, you’re still rooted in the same memories, the same shared moments.

But even if that doesn’t happen, you can let go with peace, knowing that you’ve grown, and that Jesus has been the one constant through all the ups and downs of friendship. Adulting is hard, relationships are messy, but there’s always grace for us in every season of change.

 So, here’s to the friendships that were, the ones that are, and the ones that could be again. And here’s to the friend who never leaves our side—even when we’re too busy adulting to notice.

Growing Daily With Grace,

Irish🤎